Crisp Comfort

Before my siblings were born I would wake up early being quiet, tiptoeing, avoiding the creaky stair to sit in front of the television with the sound as low as it could go to rewatch the VHS we had rented the day before and eat salted hula hoops, pickled onion space raiders, cheesy wotsits. At my dad’s house there were Phileas Fogg devilshly hot tortilla chips, King cheese and onion and MTV. Tortilla chips remind me of Drive by R.E.M. Micheal Stipe crowdsurfing in black and white. A soundtrack to my holidays back home in ‘92. Tick, tock. Tick, tock. My time there was counted in days - I would wake up and say 27 days left. 26. 25. When it got to the last five i’d wake up and start crying. Did crisps, movies and music help or have they cut a nostalgic scar on my life?

In Ireland my pocket money went on banshee bones, Manhattan white cheddar popcorn, bacon rancheros, burger bites, onion rings. Chocolate bars, fizzy jellies and ice creams too but it was the crisps that were what I missed. When the occasion appears i’ll have a bag after the pub and munch them on the bus. The same bus i’ve been taking since Drive .

A few weeks ago https://www.instagram.com/chris__packet/ came into my algorithm which reminded me of packets and flavours forgotten about. What is the scientific explanation of lost treasure food memories? The glimmer of then. Who knew that a pack of cheeseburger flavoured Quarterbacks from the corner shop on the way home after school would hold that much weight?

Yesterday while reading The Guardian this https://www.theguardian.com/artanddesign/2026/jan/19/uk-crisp-packet-designs-sports-banger and R.E.M. started playing in my head while walking the dog. Crisp archaeology.

Digging through the layers I find myself at a birthday party while the others jump around and dance in the rented room at a folded out table next to the bowl of Twiglets, not stopping until the bowl was finished. These binges didn’t stop. Twenty years later after a night of drinking and no dinner- Twiglets in the dark until the bag is empty and fingers stained.

When I started secondary school i’d buy a pack while waiting for the bus - the first taste of Brannigans Roast Beef and Mustard was a gamechanger - the same strong flavour that i loved on my school sandwiches: Colmans mustard. I don’t think they make these anymore but they tasted like wasabi. There was a smoked ham and pickle flavour too that my taste has forgotten.

For years I’ve half joked that I want to start a offal flavour crisp company. This was before my brothers bought me Lays hot and spicy Chicken Feet/ Duck Tongue for Christmas. There must be other flavours out there. I’d love to give it a go - smoked tongue and horseradish, devilled kidneys, tripe and onions. A niche market, not something a kid would pick up before or after school or eat for breakfast… I hear the strings arranged by John Paul Jones on Drive , tick, tock, tick, tock.